STYLE FILE: CASSANDRA FROM WAYNE'S WORLD

 

She’s a babe! Shwing! She sings, she plays the bass, and she’s stylish as hell. Cassandra from Wayne’s World is the ultimate package, and I have wanted to be like her (or just be her) for a very long time now.  

 
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Oh Cassandra, the hoops, the red lips, the ivory white fender bass. I think you are trying to end my life with your glamour. The matching lace dress and opera length gloves are sexy and electrifying, while the giant hoops are playful and bold. Also, shout out to the guitar player on the left completely pulling off the open vest  and bolo tie combo.

 

 
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Have you ever thought “I wish I had an outfit that was stylish, but flexible enough to allow me to kick some douchebag’s face in”? Well, lucky for you Cassandra has already figured out that dilemma. This large collared cropped vest with tiny white shorts, all denim of course, is so rock n roll it makes my heart ache with jealousy. Seriously, if you know where to purchase something like this, call me.

 

 
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Cassandra was rocking the shoelace around the neck thing before you, every girl on tumblr. This laced up chest gives Cassandra a sexy deep plunge, while the laced up sleeves give her… airflow? I’m not sure about the function, but I know it looks cool AF.

 

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If you have anything bad to say about this look, you can zip it! In this ensemble, Cassandra is looking like the most seductive pencil pouch at the middle school. This zipped up fantasy has some mystery to it: do these zippers unzip to reveal her skin beneath? Do they zip at all? Is there a butt zipper for easy bathroom access? I need answers, people.

 

 
 
 

Last year I had bangs, and whenever I didn’t style them they looked like this. So my question is, how come Cassandra looks cute with messy bangs and I looked like a homeless German boy? Well, it’s probably because she could seriously take off those pillow cases behind her, put them on her body, and make them look good.